Monday, March 26, 2007

Blue-Light Special

I find it utterly humiliating to be pulled over by a police officer. In Saturday's case, it was for speeding ... and having an expired registration. Now I was going 69 mph in a 55-mph-zone, but it was late, there were no cars on the road, it ought to be 65 on this highway anyway, and everyone goes between 62 and 65 mph through there. I was hoping he wouldn't give me the ticket. I have a flawless record. Excuse me, I had a flawless record. I just wasn't paying attention. And the registration thing is a problem, but my wife sent the state a check about five weeks ago - we just haven't heard back from them yet.

So there it is. Now you know I'm a sinner just like you. Cheers, you dirty bastards.

6 comments:

Dan said...

that made me laugh out loud. Not that you got a ticket...but your closing line.

Alison Hodgson said...

Me too.

You were sounding a little excus-y, a little victim-y, but you had me laughing at "Cheers" and the "dirty" was just frosting on the cake.

Anonymous said...

As the District Judge over Davidson county, I will be watching for your name to come across my desk. Your ticket fine will be tripled and your going to have to stand in the Center of Denton for a Public Ceremony.

We are implementing a new Public Humiliation Program. Anyone found using such foul language to describe their hard working police officers will have their mouths "Washed Out With Soap!" Yes, sir, scrubbed in fact!

You will be our "First Public Example" for the Metropolitan of Denton, NC. We do not wish for this behavior to continue...Blogging or otherwise. There is no excuse!

I certainly hope you have learned your lesson, young man! Our patrol cars are on the lookout for you!

Unknown said...

Judge Judy, such a program doesn't surprise me, what with Davidson County's police force trooping around more military than police force - more shock and awe more than protect and serve.

Boys! Do they ever grow up?

kkollwitz said...

Please understand, if it weren't for unreasonable traffic laws, there'd be no way for the government to make a criminal out of the average citizen.

Unknown said...

I got pulled over for not moving over an extra lane for a lone police car running his lights on the shoulder of the off ramp. I thought I only had to slow down, but apparantly I had to move over an entire lane (if one was available).

I was given a warning, because while he had me stopped 15 cars passed us in the same lane I had been driving in. He sort of lossed his edge when I was the only car on the road at the time he stopped me and then after he stopped me no one pulled over an extra lane. I almost laughed at him for trying to be so stern as cars were whizzing by him. "You see what a big problem this is?" he said as he handed me my warning ticket.